13 Weeks :)

Miss Harper is getting bigger and bigger! She has been a good girl for momma and has really eased up on my morning sickness...with the exception of this weekend in Tucson...Ewww.  The kids complained that I kept them up at night because I threw up "too loudly"...so sorry lol. 

Baby Flash Villarreal...forever in our hearts

A little over a month ago we learned some devastating news.  I laid in the ultrasound room, surrounded by doctors, residents and assistants...and I knew something wasn't right...in fact, I could tell something was really wrong. Nobody was talking.  My doctor scanned, back and forth between baby a and baby b.  Only one heart beat.  We had lost baby b and I was flooded with feelings of guilt, sadness and emptiness.  How did I not know?  I felt like I let my baby down...like I should have done more but didn't...  My amazing doctors (have I mentioned how awesome my repro docs are?) Were so compassionate. They took this last picture for me of our twins together and walked me out the private exit with a hug and tears in their eyes.  Throughout the day my inbox was flooded with messages of support from my nurses,doctors and assistants.  I spent the day at home, with Cody. We cried...slept...cried a little more add attempted to make sense of our loss. 

We named him Flash.  He was ours for a short time but we will love him for an eternity.  Unfortunately, the sub chorionic bleed had grown and caused his placenta to detach enough to disrupt his supply of nutrients.  Luckily it has since stabilized and us not threatening Harper at all. 

We still see his little gummy bear body at every scan...and my heart aches a little every day missing my Flash.  We are grateful tho that Harper is healthy and we can't wait to meet our little love. 

My Harper Love

I'm in love.  Miss Harper already has momma and daddy totally in love...like whoa kinda love...can't describe it kinda love.  Yes...she's a "Miss".  Lil miss Harper was a good girl during our high def ultrasound and the docs are confident a are having a girl!! Squeal!!! She has the cutest little button nose, I could stare at her all day.  Austin wasn't sure about having another sister but but now he asks to feel her every chance he gets.  Be...still...my...heart...xoxo

Cravings and Such...

This pregnancy is starting to sink in and feel real...I've developed some wicked cravings!  Tonight I had a tuna sandwich for dinner...with a large orange juice from Sonic. The combination was amazing:)

The First Pregnancy Purchase

My belly band! Much needed, already. I am so excited to not have to button my pants at work tomorrow! Hahaha! Its hard to believe that I am already popping out...but then again...with twins its bound to happen sooner than later, and...I.love.it...

Grandma Amanda's Homemade Pickles

A.life.saver...They don't make me want to barf when I think about them (these foods are few and far between these days) and they actually settle my stomach...as much as ones stomach can be settled when two growing human beings have declared war on my body...Today was the first really bad day of morning all day sickness.  I couldn't get out of bed for church this morning and although I didn't actually barf today I really really wanted to.  I was pretty much (and still am) on the verge of running to the bathroom all day long.  This will pass.....

Too Soon?

This mama's belly has officially popped! Too soon? I don't know...I'm growing two humans so I'm thinking not...I am buying a belly band tomorrow:)

Oh man, I'm in love...

Can someone please tell me how I can be so in love with my twins already?!  They are only the size of lentil beans but I have found myself literally staring at the sonogram pic for hours on end.  It probably doesn't help that I've spent the last 36 hours on bed rest so it's not like I have much else to do.  There was a minor scare at work yesterday morning.  Bleeding and cramping and a little panicking (ok, lots) but all is well now.  My amazing team of repro docs and nurses have quadrupled my progesterone to give my little peanuts every chance possible. 

Such a blessing it was that Cody just so happened to be at work getting fillings done when the bleed started.  And...his dentist also went through multiple IVF attempts and suffered a miscarriage and a seriously preterm labor and loss of her beautiful twin boys.  She.gets.me.  I couldn't ask for a better friend and the tears are flowing as I think about her and all she has been through.  She instantly read the look on my face when I came to her operatory in a tearful panic.  She finished the filling as fast as she could and met me in the bathroom for a pep talk while Cody packed my things.  We rushed home under doctors orders and I immediately swallowed a bolus of progesterone.  The pharmacy then delivered more and I was ordered on strict bed rest till the bleeding and cramping stopped. 

Thank goodness, the bleeding slowed almost as quickly as it started and I am now completely free of bleeding and cramping.  It's quite possible that I pushed myself too hard, as it was my first day back on my feet at work since finding out I was pregnant.  My computer is way too heavy to push around from operatory to operatory and I am now going to return to my desk and the students and patients will just have to come to me to settle accounts :).  Bleeding and cramping during pregnancy is fairly common (although still reason for concern) so I am banking on the fact that I just did too much yesterday and need to learn to take it easy.  I am so thankful for a completely understanding boss who has been so accomodating and loving through our entire IVF journey.

I am now on progesterone lozenges (that are absolutely appaling and not only taste like complete ass, but look like gooey chunks of bologna...ewwwww) three times a day in addition to the progesterone suppository and estrogen tablets twice a day that I have been on since our transfer.  Please pray with us that our peanuts are ok.  We have a follow up scan Wednesday the 16th and should be seeing adorable little heartbeats by then!  It will be a long week, but we have faith that all is well!

Holy cows!

TWINS! Fraternal and due September 4! we are totally legit excited, to put it Meigan style! This is fer real! Time to double up on...everything!